Just a Thought (or Two or Three...)---The Carving of Life

Here.

I was walking along the trail behind our house, way out in the back where there's a little patch of naked hill and untouched trees and a little park bench by the concrete path that runs all through to the end of the little backway. I was going to listen to music, I really was. I had Lazy Eye, by Silversun Pickups* all ready to go. And I played it a couple of times going up that empty, wild hill. But then, looking down on the path and the trees and all the silly little houses and silly little people going about their stupid, wonderful little lives, and all this beauty, empty, empty natural beauty just a mess of it everywhere...

Well, I finally took them out and didn't end up putting them back in. I just... listened. listened to the wind blow through the hillside and the trees the rustle to leaves and carry the cawing, chortling magpies from tree to tree. Listened to the music drifting up from someone's open window as they practiced some sort of wind instrument. listened as someone sheared their yard with some noisy power-tool. And I just began to think.

Now, don't get me wrong, I think constantly; my brain won't stop yapping. But, truth be told, sometimes I just get so lost in my mind and all the little things and people that go on in there that I forget that there is an outside world, or at least one outside of dismal prospects and irritating people who can't possibly comprehend what plagues my cranium relentlessly--all day, everyday-- and foolishly insult it with their pestering. But here it was, unavoidable. No, that's not quite right; my brain has the power to block out most things (unless it's to my convenience, of course, like at social events with crowds or balloons -_-. Stupid popping balloons and crowds...), but here I was, fighting for this beauty, this healing God made with his very whisper. And I thought a lot of things, because really, I realized and felt I could think of anything, and that freedom I very well indulged myself in. And one little, silly, trivial thought that I thought was...

Music, it's just ordered sound. Just sound made in a pattern which sounds good to us (or not so much...). But the wind, the birds humming and cackling, the leaves rustling, the buzzing of the weed-whacker and the sweet melody of a wind instrument through someone's window-- the sounds of nature, the sounds of life, those are music in their own right. but instead of human beings ordering it, God is ordering it, according to what sounds best to Him, and we just happen, sometimes, to catch a glimpse of its beauty.

I guess I thought a lot of things. Another thing I thought was, I suppose the wind does have sense, order, yes? because it really describes everything it touches--it was describing the hill and the trees and the birds and the fences and the houses. It describes life itself as it carves it out through sound. And some creatures, with their brains wired a certain way, Like bats, they can hear how sound describes life. And how deaf are we? thinking wind is just wind and sound is just sound and music and all those other things are so irrelevant, when in reality...
they're so very beautiful, and so very, very signifcant.




*(which, in all fairness, I did learn about in Rock Band, BUT later fell in love with and now own an album of, so HA!)

Re-Emergence

Ok, hello everybody. It's your author speaking.

Now you're probably thinking "Golly, where the heck is she? I mean, I know consistency's not her thing all the time, but come on! A month and a half is really, really bad, even for her! Did she die or something?"

Ok, maybe you weren't thinking quite that, but something along those lines. Well, truth be told, I am ashamed by my late, late posts for certain topics I very much wanted to write about but found myself unable to do so. I do apologize and would like to announce that, while I may very well write these posts or some form of them, I am forgiving myself and moving on and plead that you all do the same, as well as I am going to ban myself from making promises; it (for lack of a more proper term at the moment) screws with my creative abilities. I have anxiety problems already (apparently) and it doesn't help, so, yeah no more promises. Oh, well, just one more, because here's the second and more important reason I haven't posted much.

With the exception of the encouraging music post, I didn't want to write anything about anything frivolous until I got this giant weight off my chest--- the Colorado shooting. It rocked my world, sneaked up on me, and knocked me down. And I just never got back up.

I didn't know how to feel about it. I still don't know how to feel about. It shook me to core, and that's all I know. I planned a big long post, and then I planned a short one. But I've finally decided, I'm just going to write a post, express a bit how I feel, and explain how my life has changed since then and how it has affected the blog, then move on.

Well, I wasn't sure how to approach this, so I'm simply going to say that this incident messed me up more than I even realized the first time around, and the wound is still healing. My heart goes out to the victims and their families and friends, and to the shooter's family as well. And, and I know many of you may think ill of me for it, but my heart is burdened for the shooter as well. What desperation and hopelessness and bindings of sin would motivate someone to do this? What was the moment when he crossed the point of no return, never to look back?

I pray for them. All of them. I don’t know what to do about it. I still don’t know what to do about it. So, please pray, as I continue to do so, that God will reveal what he wants from me in this situation. Pray that it’s not too late.

(Note: Justsomerandomguy on YouTube posted a message that really struck a chord for me, and really sums up how I feel in many ways. [I do apologize that this is your first introduction to his videos via my blog, because they’re hilarious and he’s quite clever and I wish you could be introduced under better circumstances, but I still recommend his video concerning the shooting, so here it is.])

Now, that is not to say that this is why I took so long to post, don’t get me wrong. It’s a component of it, because I simply had no idea what to say for the longest time, and staved off posting partially for that reason. The other reason for not posting for a while (besides me being extremely prone to procrastination, especially if I have no idea how to go about doing something), is that I’ve been considering the direction of this blog. I don’t want it to be just another feed of idle prattle, of fluff, so to speak. I originally began this blog to 1) express some things on my mind, so as to conserve and share them [I have so much going on in there I can barely sleep, you see], 2) make money, 3) to strengthen my relationship, and other people’s relationships, with God, not necessarily in that order. I don’t know if I’m doing that properly or if I’d like to begin another blog to blabber on about other things, or what. So I took a break, a depressed valley of a break. I’m still trying to figure it out, and until I do, this blog will be rather quiet. When it is all figured out to a satisfactory level, you all will hear much more from me. Until then, please be patient. I will post as best as I can. Thank you, loyal readers. I only hope I will not disappoint you.



~rrc

What God Had to Say to Me Today...

"Better to meet a bear robbed of her cubs
than a fool in his folly.~Proverbs 17:12

My devotional bible says in  it's annotations "Sure to attack you and rip you open." (Zondervan NIV Study Bible [not properly cited, I know..."

Well, I'm not quite sure what significance this holds for me...at least, I hope it doesn't particularly hold significance for me. But it's important, and I'm sure it is even more important to one of my readers, so...

Anyway, goodnight! God bless!

~RRC

P.S. Also for tonight: "Pleasent words are like a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones."~Proverbs 16:24
This one always has prominate significance for me! Well, goodnight again my readers! God be with you!

...You Know What, We Simply Present: Gwen Smith's Uncluttered

Oh dear, this really doesn't fall into any of the categories...It's just been on my mind today.

Awesome video, just awesome. Excellent message, and...only <10000 page views! (so it COULD count for a "Love Deprived"...)

Numbers Have Love

Just know this. Numbers...add meaning to life.
They don't just tell you
how much time you've wasted today
how little you are really getting paid
How long a distance you have to travel to reach your goals
Sometimes they say "You're almost there; don't give up."
Or "You've defied the odds, you've broken the rules, but the rules don't care. Congrats."
Or "This one little
mistake
waste
problem
incident
spike of pain
moment of heartache
failure
misfortune
hurt
sorrow
time of despair
is like an instantaneous velocity of the speeding line
it's existence holds things in place
without it, the physical as we know it
couldn't exist
but the number describing it
is so small
so infinitesimally small
it infinitely nears zero
it brushes against the nothing
it reached the Event Horizon
and in the grand scheme
When infinity becomes our reality
though it shouldn't be forgotten
because scars, you see,
add character
and harden the skin
and remind us of life before,
it can still be counted
as zero.
nothing.
nothing at all."

Sometimes Numbers are much nicer than you first assumed.

Devotional: Blessings of God---No One Forsaken

Psalm 9:10,18 (KJV)

"And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord , hast not forsaken them that seek thee."

And

"[18] For the needy shall not alway be forgotten: the expectation of the poor shall not perish for ever."

Just felt like sharing that with you tonight. This exact subject has been on my mind a ton recently. let us act as the hands of God and reach out to those in need. Let us allow God to bless us as well. We all could use it, especially in times such as these.

God bless, my readers. God bless.

~RRC

Love Deprived: New Age Improv on a Bench

Okay, I cheated a little, but...

I am seeking out things which are quite good or excellent, but which few appreciate: videos, art, songs, bands, theories (math, science...), etc. and letting the world know about. Well, okay, for now the occasional random person who stumbles upon this blog by accident and doesn't immediately click the "next blog" button or tries a different URL or something.

This one I found out about during a Philosophy group, on the subjects of Christianity and Relativism. More on that subject later, but for now...enjoy. (P.S. We Christians are not that cruel, it is not the love of God...but it's sure dang funny.)

(P.P.S. Most videos I post will have 10,000 views or less, but there are exceptions [i.e. I will sometimes post videos with less than, say, 100,000 views, but I prefer more under-loved. The more obscure, the better!]. also, if anyone has any suggestions at all, I'm open to it. However, be warned---I am far less open to any thing, videos, songs, or otherwise, with inapropriateness content of any kind. I am not open to anything obscene. At all. No exceptions.
[:P too harsh? Thought it sounded a little stiff... You know, in a hilarious kind of way...])

(Edit: I have discontinued Love Deprived, but I still post stuff that I think needs more love, and i will mention it when I post it. You may still enjoy. ^J^)

Hardened Hearts---Revelation

Okay, I can't claim to be a prophet or immensely wise in biblical matters (even if I was, it would be extremely arrogant to advertise it so...). But occasionally, I do experience revelations regarding life questions , passages of the bible, Etc. And, since this is improtant to me personally, I thought, might as well share it; spreading the word of God and furthering His works is my main purpose and goal anyhow.

So, for the longest time, I have reasoned, based on the views of a certain humanities class of sorts (thank God for Ms. M) and The rhetorical works of dear Clive Staples Lewis, among other sources, all views of which I have accepted into my own, that God created humanity with free will for the purpose of having other, sentient, non-puppet beings to form relationships with. This is the reason for sin, and the cause of much good. This is the reason God created us. But, if this is one aspect of our being which He gave us a right to, and, because of it's very nature, can not and will not encroach upon, there is a disparity caused by passages such as this: "And the Lord said unto Moses, When thou goest to return into Egypt, see that thou do all those wonders before Pharaoh, which I have put in thine hand: but I will harden his heart, that he shall not let the people go." (Exodus 4:21 [KJV] [emphasis added])

Wait, so, God can harden our hearts? he can reach in our chests and turn flesh to granite, is that what you're saying? What happened to free will? What happened to the choice to sin or obey? Does that mean that people can get punished for actions they had no control over? That goes completely against God's principles--- he loves us, that's what he created us for, So that we may choose to love Him. And it doesn't just mean people who do what he asks of them, but everyone. Everyone. That means he doesn't just love the saint, but the sinner too; not just you or me (not to say either of us fall into other category), but the neighbor across the street who has loud parties at 3:00 in the morning, your teacher, your best friend, your worst enemy, the guy who stole an old lady's wallet, and, yes, the Pharaoh (not to mention all the people of Egypt who got to pay for Mr. Heart-of-Granite's antagonistic obstinence). What the heck man?!?

This one, believe it or not, troubled me for a long time. Pretty much since the day I read the verse, actually, so, since 3rd grade. Howeve, recently, I had a revelation and I think I finally figured it out (see what a little faith and patience can do?). And it was all thanks to this little jem of a passage here: "But though he [Jesus] had done so many miracles before them, yet they believed not on him: [40] He hath blinded their eyes, and hardened their heart; that they should not see with their eyes, nor understand with their heart, and be converted, and I should heal them. [this is a quote from Isaiah {though the verse is from John} explaining that this had been prophysized about before, but nobody really listened or understood when the events unfolded] [42] Nevertheless among the chief rulers also many believed on him; but because of the Pharisees they did not confess him , lest they should be put out of the synagogue: [43] For they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God." (John 12:37,40, 42-43 [KJV])

Ooooohh, it all makes sense now! Just as God doesn't just change your attitude when it turns sour, he's not going to just coat your heart in ice to serve His purposes; He doesn't need to. If you make yourself usable, He'll use you. If not, He'll find a way, but never in a manner that overtakes your free will. Instead, he puts you in a situation that brings out result already writhing around in your soul. if you allowed His will to take over, he could just get rid of it and bend the situation in your favor; if Pharaoh had accepted Him by accepting His people and His messenger, then this wouldn 't have even come up. god would have found some other way to display His glory. But, since His people had been wronged and the Egyptians refused to change (He did give them at least a generation or two, right?) they needed to be taught a lesson-- don't mess with God's peeps, yo! (okay, that was silly, but seriously, don't.)

So, bottom line, God only uses what's in the heart already-- if it's good, then the individual will be bless, if it's bad, God will bring it forth. We certainly don't need any encouragement to be sinful, and God is fully aware of that.

Now, I'm sure there are some exceptions or loophole situations of some sort I didn't mention, but it's fine, that's how God operates-- breaking the rules while keeping them (amphibious fish anyone? Yes, they do exist! Look it up.). All I know, is that he never, ever, breaks His own rules without keeping them. He may make loopholes, but He never goes against his nature or back on His word. So if He made sentient beings instead of puppets, He's never going to try and make them puppets. He gave us a choice, and He's not going to take that away; it's up to us to make the right one, and not wait around for the offer to end.